If you are currently in crisis
If you are thinking of suicide, feel you may harm yourself or are in immediate danger, contact the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline by calling or texting 988 now. You can also chat online at 988lifeline.org.
988 Lifeline provides free, confidential, 24/7 support to people experiencing suicidal thoughts, mental health distress, substance use crisis, or emotional overwhelm. There’s no need to wait until things get much worse to ask for help.
If you are in immediate physical danger, call 911 or go to your local emergency room. Please stay. Tell one safe person what’s going on and have someone else help you for the next few minutes.
Have you ever thought about suicide or wondered if the people around you would be better off without you?Have you ever thought about suicide? Then you’re not as alone as you think. According to data from the CDC, an estimated 14.3 million U.S. adults seriously considered suicide in 2024. I work as a clinical psychologist, so I get to see the sensitive side of people. I get to witness my clients’ hidden identities, whether the world judges them as cunning corporate executives, passionate advocates, or resourceful retirees. I know the depth of their grief.
Suicidal thoughts can plague your consciousness even when others are blessing you. I don’t know how committed you are to thinking through a plan, or how close you feel to acting on that idea. Maybe it was just a fleeting thought, “Wouldn’t it be great if I wasn’t there?” and they never thought about the concept any further. Or maybe you spent longer thinking about the scenario, imagining how so-and-so would react if they found your last note. You may have taken it a step further and tried to end your own life.
No matter what trajectory you’re on, we’d like to suggest a heart-to-heart. here. I will treat you honestly and kindly. All I ask is that you read this article with an open mind. transaction?
Stop being so nervous and let me get straight to the point. I don’t want you to die. Before you continue reading, tell one safe person what’s happening, call or text 988, or stay away from anything that could harm yourself. It’s not because I don’t care about your pain and suffering. Rather, your life is precious. You may have scoffed at what I just said. Understood. Perhaps for a long time you did not see any value in life (if at all), which created your desire to die. But I want to tell you why I believe your life is worth saving.
Let’s start by reviewing some of the thoughts you may have heard in your head and some of the things I might say to you when we’re chatting.
What should I do if the pain is unbearable?
Maybe the person you loved more than life has passed away or abandoned you in some way. Or maybe you’ve been bullied. Brutal. I was raped. Or maybe you’re dealing with physical pain. Whether your doctor diagnoses you with a fatal illness or an accident replaces your carefree days with chronic pain, you feel trapped. The intense suffering never stops and makes life depressing.
I can relate. Ever since my father passed away unexpectedly, the sad part of me has wanted to fast-forward to heaven where he is rather than wallowing here in pain. But while I empathize with the deep longing of my character, I have no plans or intentions to harm myself. Other therapists have done the opposite. They attempted suicide but survived. One was furious at God for keeping him alive, but now aims to help others.
You too can decide to live. Ask God for special grace to help you through difficult situations (2 Corinthians 12:9). Because God is the Alpha and the Omega (Revelation 1:8, Revelation 22:13), the beginning and the end, you can ask God in His time to help you have a good ending. Be assured that God is near to the brokenhearted (Psalm 34:18). The Lord hears you (Psalm 34:15, 1 Peter 3:12).
What should I do if I feel burdened?
If your goal is to make your loved one feel better, committing suicide will only accomplish that goal. When someone commits suicide, those left behind often suffer from long-term feelings of guilt and shame. That’s not all. If you leave home early, other family members may imitate you and commit suicide in the future. Hemingway illustrates this tragic principle. Seven members of this family died by their own hands, including the legendary novelist Ernest. I don’t understand why you believe you are a burden to your family. (They may vehemently dispute this with you). However, we can ask God to give them the strength and grace to face their responsibilities. If that includes you, then so be it.
What should I do if I feel unwanted or rejected?
I’m so sorry if this thought has been spinning around in your mind. Perhaps you feel unloved because your mom screamed in your face that you were the biggest mistake. Or she tried to abort you or put you up for adoption. Or maybe your caregiver did everything in their power to mistreat you, or someone somewhere did something that planted the seeds of rejection early on.
Feeling unwanted can definitely destroy us. But how about considering this idea in a new light? Instead of uniting with it, think of it as just a part of you, as if you all agree that you deserve to die.
Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy, a theory I use in my practice, explains that our souls contain multiple parts. If you admit this, you won’t go crazy. So what happens when you tell the part of you that feels rejected that you want it? Just as you wouldn’t want to have your toes, nose, or any other body part amputated, if you feel that any part of your soul is being rejected, let them know that as far as you are concerned, you want that part. There are ways to make every part of us feel wanted. More on this later.
What do you do if you find it too difficult to move on with your life?
Agreed. Even if you used to have a hard time making ends meet, you can see that life can become very difficult when so many things happen day in and day out. But the point here is that no one on earth gets here by chance. The men and women behind your pregnancy may not have planned it, but if you’re still breathing, it’s because God’s hand was on you from day one.
Think about how God multiplied your tiny cells into a fetus and called you even then (Jeremiah 1:5). When the time for your birth arrived, God “separated (you) from your mother’s womb” (Galatians 1:15, NKJV). From the moment you arrived, He was ready to love you (Psalm 22:10). As you grew up, God sent angels to protect you (Matthew 18:10). God has ordained good things for your future (Jeremiah 29:11). The Lord cherishes you so much that every time you cry, He stores up your tears like a treasure (Psalm 56:8). God has vowed to never abandon you no matter what (Hebrews 13:5).
The important thing is that God has nurtured and protected you since childhood. God will continue to care for you because He never changes (Hebrews 13:8). But you have to let God do it. Let’s unpack that method.
How can we give time to God when we feel hopeless?
Make your needs clear to God. Tell God that you place all your cares in His hands (Psalm 55:22, Psalm 62:8, Matthew 11:28, Philippians 4:6-7, 1 Peter 5:7). God created you with great care (Psalm 139:13-14). He should be responsible for your happiness, right? But combine it with prayer while waiting for God to respond. Before you ignore me, please understand that I am allergic to waiting. The wait was often shortened by my impatience that I couldn’t go on any longer. Still, if I had done that, I would have had a fun result. I might share some of these stories next time.
The point is, I know how painful it is to wait. But I also know that divine salvation often comes in the form of human participation. Perhaps in response to your fervent prayers, God is sending a neighbor to visit. Or maybe he’s telling a friend to mail a thoughtful gift. There are millions of possibilities for how God uses people to let you know they matter. But since people are notoriously “slow to believe” (Luke 24:25) and therefore slow to respond to God’s nagging, we must learn to wait for an answer. That is, you cannot commit suicide during that time.
Where can I get help for suicidal thoughts now?
Would you like to wait on God together? Meanwhile, consider the following treatment-related websites:
IFS, the theory I mentioned earlier, helps you love every part of your soul, including the parts that are hurt, rejected, and longing for escape. Find certified and trained IFS therapists from around the world here. Focus on the Family’s Christian Counselor Network lists Christian therapists nationwide.
You can also:
Finally, “May the Lord bless you and protect you. May the Lord smile on you and be gracious to you. May the Lord show you grace and give you peace” (Numbers 6:24-26, New Translation of the Bible).
And may you let him do that.
Frequently asked questions about suicidal thoughts and Christian hope
What should I do if I’m thinking of suicide right now?
Call or text 988, tell a safe person nearby, and stay away from anything that could hurt yourself. You don’t have to live this moment alone. Does having suicidal thoughts mean you are disobeying God?
No, suicidal thoughts often indicate that the person is experiencing overwhelming pain, fatigue, trauma, depression, or hopelessness. God is close to those who are hurting, and asking for help is not a failure. Can Christians get professional help for suicidal thoughts?
yes. Christians can seek help from therapists, doctors, crisis counselors, pastors, trusted friends, and family members. Professional care is one way God provides support and protection. Which Bible verse should I embrace when I feel suicidal?
Psalm 34:18 is a powerful starting point. God is close to the brokenhearted and will save the mentally broken. How can you help someone who may be suicidal?
Take their words seriously, be there if possible, ask them directly if they are thinking of suicide, help them contact 988 or emergency medical care, and do not put them in immediate danger and isolate them.
For further reading
Photo credit: ©Getty Images/splendens
Dr. Audrey Davidhiser (www.aimforbreakthrough.com) is a California licensed psychologist, Internal Family Systems (IFS) Certified Therapist, and IFSI Certified Clinical Consultant. After founding the Los Angeles Dream Center Counseling Center, she now provides IFS therapy to trauma survivors, including those with religious trauma, and assists with IFS training. She is a regular writer for Crosswalk.com and a columnist for iBelieve.com. Her book, Grieving Wholeheartly, about how IFS supports the grieving process, was published by InterVarsity Press in July 2025. Follow her on Facebook, Instagram, and Substack @DrAudreyD.
