Is that a joke? Do you find a rest as a single mother? Motherhood is full-time, 24/7, 365 days a year, with no holidays. We love those babies more than anyone else on Earth. They bring us joy and laughter, and our hearts can almost burst when we see them hit a new milestone. Mothers are unparalleled love, but we do not serve any other. The role that mothers play at home is irreplaceable. Many mothers struggle to find time to sneak into the shower or sit for 30 seconds, but they don’t actually have much rest. And if you don’t have the grace to provide for that single mother, considering that spouse, it’s easy to see why single mothers are tired.
Mom is a booboo kiss, driver, scheduler, advice grantor, organizer, cleaning woman, homework helper, cook, sock locator, problem solver, defender. We iron, wash dishes, make phone calls, throw lots of clothes, apply lipstick, cook meals. It is usually before the kids wake up.
My older kids have grown up, so there are a few things I have learned to be critical to be the best mom I can be.
Don’t stop dreaming. When I found a single mother of two children at age 19, it was simply everything I could do to survive. The daily tasks of caring for children, working, and cleaning seemed unbearable. All of my childhood dreams went to the backburner somewhere and were forgotten over the years. As the years went by, I began to realize that the dreams God had given me had not been lost. I found myself so much that God wanted me to be me through those long ago dreams. I stopped trying and simply took a break.
Take your time for you. I talk to so many single mothers who feel guilty for committing a sin at any time for myself. They work full time and have an endless to-do list, so once they get a few minutes of downtime they are sure they can’t use it on themselves. Yes, it is important that your child receive quality time with you. But take the time to work with you and grow as a God woman, realize that you are not underestimating your child. In fact, it’s very useful to them that mothers run at 100%, but barely functioning at 50%.
Take part in a Bible study for single mothers. I’ve said it thousands of times, and I say it thousands more. We all admire fellowship. The same goes for single mothers. A single mother’s Bible study gives single mothers the opportunity to share their unique experiences. They share networks, ideas and best practices, celebrate victory and pray through hardships. Bible studies by single mothers are gaining popularity across the country. Find a nearby place.
Enjoy a girl’s weekend. Even if it’s a stay, you can find a great rest while gathering your girlfriends and enjoying a special time! Gather a few friends and plan your weekend. There is no need to be a fee.
Jennifer Magio is the life of the Department of Single Mothers, a mom of three, Jeff’s wife and founder of the national nonprofit organization. She is the author of four books, including churches and single mothers. She was named one of America’s top 10 most influential people in 2017 and 2015 by Dr. John Maxwell, and hundreds including the New York Times, Dr. James Dobson, Joni and Family Talk Radio with Friends. He appeared at the Mono Media venue. And many others.
