It’s been a difficult season.
I’m in my mid-40s and a mother of four, and it feels like a never-ending list of demands coming at me from every direction. My workload is increasing. My children’s needs have increasingly changed from physical to emotional as they transition from teen to teen years and beyond. My body is changing. Financial burdens are increasing. The calendar seems to be consistently full, but I feel like we’re just scratching the surface.
That’s not all bad. In fact, a lot of incredibly good things are happening – and that’s the beauty of life. The good and the difficult often exist side by side, like a couple walking hand in hand on the beach. They are together but separate and exist parallel to each other.
This was my daily reality. Goodness means joining hands with hardship. And I feel like all this good and all this trouble is increasing my need for Jesus. The need seems to grow stronger by the minute.
I run all day with my eyes closed and think about what’s going to happen. And you can see that I desperately need him.
So before you close your eyes, pick up your phone and set an alarm for the next morning. As you move the numbers with your fingers to the desired time, you are filled with hope that you will be able to stand up much earlier than the rest of your family. Before all the demands start knocking on the door, we want to start our day with the Lord by touching His Word.
I know that this intentionally quiet moment will get my day off to a good start.
I will not hit the snooze button tomorrow. This is often the last thought before the waves of sleep wash over you.
beep. beep. beep.
In the morning darkness, I reach for my cell phone. Only 9 minutes left. That’s all you need.
beep. beep. beep.
Maybe 9 more minutes… Who would have thought 9 minutes could be this fascinating?
This is my current pattern. It happens all the time. You go to bed with the desire to wake up earlier than your family, but the desire to sleep a little longer trumps that.
Years ago, when I was navigating a heavy and constricting stream of negative thoughts, this may have pushed me over the edge mentally. Look, I can’t even achieve this small goal. I’m a failure. My faith is not strong enough. I wonder why I can only do what I set out to do…
Such thoughts were familiar and persistent companions.
But that’s no longer the case.
I now know that needing an extra nine minutes of sleep doesn’t mean I’m a failure in God’s eyes. It’s not that my faith is weak. It doesn’t mean you can’t achieve your goals. That means I have a lot coming up for me right now and I need sleep.
I now know that what I need to do is not to be ashamed of myself, but to find what works for me in this season. I need to find what works in this space of midlife where demands are constantly changing and increasing.
So, now that I’ve accepted the fact that I’m not likely to win the battle between my willpower and the snooze button, what do I do? I set my alarm a little earlier. yes. It may seem silly, but it works for me.
If you want to get out of bed at 5:30 and you know you want to snooze at least once, set your alarm for 5:15. This will give you some breathing room in case you need to set your alarm twice. And for those of you who can’t wake up until you absolutely need to, no matter what time you set your alarm, I’ve had that experience too. And here’s the thing – that’s okay. The important thing is to find what suits your season.
Not all seasons look the same
Depending on the season, it can be akin to worshiping Jesus while holding a baby in the middle of the night, or sitting by the bedside of a loved one nearing the end of their life.
Depending on the season, you may appear to be talking to Jesus while waiting in the school pickup line or sitting in the bleachers at your child’s sports practice.
Depending on the season, praying for a neighbor can be similar while taking an evening walk or delivering a homemade meal to a friend who has just been diagnosed with an incurable disease.
Some seasons it looks like we are serving, and other seasons it looks like we are being served.
There is no one-size-fits-all way to worship the Lord. We are all uniquely, beautifully, and wonderfully created in the image of God, and God loves us just the way we are. He doesn’t expect perfection from us. God knows our hearts more intimately than we know ourselves. He just wants to see us. God longs for us to stay with Him in the midst of it all.
Make space for Jesus when you’re in a hurry and distracted
So how do we begin to create space for Jesus in the midst of those who are busy, in a hurry, or distracted? How do you respond to God with all these demands that pile up every day?
Start by taking it to the Lord. Pray, Lord, I want to see you. Please make a way. Please tell me how. Our prayers don’t have to be long or complicated. Holy Spirit, please guide me. Jesus, please be with me. Father, please help me. Jesus, I love you.
Let’s pray while looking at the calendar. Pray every day. Ask God where and how you can connect with Him personally, relationally (with those you are closest to), and collectively (with those connected in your community). If you feel your heart tightening, write it on your calendar. Block out time like you would your child’s sporting event or your neighborhood book club. Let God show you and trust that He will.
Try not to compare your spiritual habits and rhythms to others. The way I worship the Lord now is vastly different than it was in my 20s and 30s, and I’m sure it will continue to change with each decade of blessing I experience. our lives are not the same. Our families are not the same. Our personalities are not the same. And our experiences are not the same. Remember that what worked best for your friend may not work at all for you, and what worked yesterday may not work tomorrow. it’s okay. The way we encounter the Lord is unique, just like all of us. Celebrate the differences between stages and seasons. While you may be encouraged by someone else’s spiritual habits and practices, try not to use them as a measuring stick for your own.
Give yourself lots of grace. When we come to Jesus, His yoke is light and our burdens are lightened. God wants to wash us with His grace and wrap us tightly in His love. He’s not some angry judge in the sky waiting for you to mess up. Jesus is an intimate God who came to earth in human form. God knows who we are and doesn’t expect our lives to look like a perfect Pinterest board or Instagram feed. He knows your heart. He knows you’re dirty. And God loves you through it all. Be sure to give yourself grace if something doesn’t work as expected. God knows my heart just as He knows when I hit the snooze button. And God knows you too. Please take a short break there. He knows your heart. And God loves you.
Rest with the Lord. Our culture celebrates productivity. We are a society of actioners, but there is great value in rest. Trust me, I know this is easier said than done. Rest doesn’t come naturally or easily to me, but I know it’s good for mind, body, and soul. There is a reason why God rested on the seventh day, and a reason why God encouraged His children to rest one day. Try to rest with Him for a little while, even if it feels strange. Set your alarm for 5 minutes. Maybe it starts there. Although it may feel uncomfortable at first, beautiful things can happen in the quiet spaces of our lives.
he knows what he knows
Friends, when you are tired and stressed and all you want is Jesus but you don’t know how to make time, know that Jesus knows it. God knows the desires of your heart. God is your Father, you are His children, and He loves you more than you can imagine. Ask God to make a way for you. Ask God to show you a place or space in your life where you can meet Him. Even one minute is fine. 1 hour. Or one day. he is there I’ll reach out to you. i love you I’m waiting for you to come back.
Photo credit: ©Getty Images/eggeeggjiew
Jen Thompson is the author of Return to Jesus: An Invitation to Aby with Him in Every Beautiful, Stressful, or Tedious Moment.
