The start of a new year is often filled with resolutions like reading more books, exercising more often, and spending less time on social media. But I also think a lot about my marriage and how I want it to go in the next year. Will a new year bring a new marriage? Although I am still happily married to my husband, Perry, we both know that our marriage is constantly changing and growing.
When you think about marriage over the past year, it’s important to know what comes to mind. Does your marriage need some healing and encouragement this new year? Did it feel like it was going through a never-ending cycle in the washing machine?
When you want to improve or refocus your marriage, where do you start?
This year, we are looking at marriage as an act of service.
your marriage as a service
Have you ever thought of your marriage as a ministry? Consider what God says about marriage in the Bible and how it reflects Jesus and is an example of His relationship with His bride, the church (see Ephesians 5). Even if you are facing difficulties, your marriage can show others that they are not alone in their difficulties.
Perry and I are still learning how to navigate that space. We think about how Jesus shared bread with his friends. We want to do the same often (Luke 24:30-31). We think about how Jesus sat with people when they faced difficulties. We desire to be counselors to friends, family, and strangers (John 4:1-26).
We often open our homes to others, inviting them out for dinner, sports, or coffee. But what happens if we open our homes to couples who don’t know Jesus, or what if we start engaging with one couple more intentionally this year?
Are you ready for a new year, a new marriage, and a new ministry?Here are three ways to start thinking about the impact of your marriage.
1. Pray about it with your spouse.
Just as Jesus calls us to love God first and then love our neighbor, it’s important how we invest in our marriage through prayer. Because your focus is first on seeking God. The more often you and your spouse stop and pray together, the more spiritually connected you will feel to each other. Whether it’s having a devotional as a couple or choosing a time to pray in the morning or before bed, small changes can have an impact on your marriage.
As you invest in your own marriage through prayer, you can also influence the couples around you through prayer. Often when we pray for opportunities to impact those around us, God gives us those opportunities. Pray with your spouse that your marriage will have a daily, weekly, and monthly rhythm in fulfilling your mission together.
“Happier than ever: What is my marriage for?” A great resource for couples to experience. It is designed to assist you and your spouse in the process of entering into a new marriage service. You’ll be surprised who comes to mind as you brainstorm and pray about where God is leading you this year.
2. Prioritize your time as a couple.
Intentionally spending time together each week in a consistent rhythm strengthens your marriage. Perry and I feel more connected when we spend quality time together. That could be enjoying a movie night, cooking a meal, going for a walk, or sneaking in for a midweek lunch date. At first, it may feel forced or planned. Trust me, Perry, I felt that way too when we first got married, but switching to the mindset of “I don’t always feel that way” helped me.
When you prioritize time as a couple, make sure that time naturally flows into time with other couples. When you go out to dinner or play a game together, you can use that space to share the vulnerability that your marriage isn’t always like that, and paint a more realistic picture that marriage is sometimes beautiful and difficult.
Looking for a way to invest in your marriage? Get spiritually fulfilled with a Weekend to Remember® wedding vacation. When you and your spouse are in sync with each other, you will be better able to serve and influence others in your life this year.
3. Consider leading a small group.
Some of the most impactful marriage moments I’ve ever had have been when I witnessed myself leading other couples on the topic of faith and marriage. Leading small groups together is an opportunity to create space for significant growth, intentional vulnerability, and lasting community. Check out our favorites currently on sale!
As you enter this new year, step into new opportunities where your marriage can become a new marriage with a mission. Next year, you can influence one couple and help them deepen their relationship with each other and with God.
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Brooke Wilson is a content writer, editor, and digital designer at FamilyLife. She serves remotely in Greenville, South Carolina. She and her husband Perry have an adorable baby boy named Parker. I often see her at coffee shops with friends or when I’m hiking with my chocolate lab, Willow.
