“Look at this excavator, Laura!” I only look at brown eyes on my fassety time screen. Often, ceiling fans fill in the screen, but my grandchild talks to me. I’m happy to hear his little voice. I keep pinning my face to the phone screen, as he knows my grandmother is listening to all the words.
We hope we don’t live far from our grandchildren, but we are very grateful to get a glimpse of them every few days through technology like FaceTime. Tips for intentional grandparents don’t come naturally to me. Frankly, I feel that I am the least well-written to write about this topic, but this may be God’s way of renewing my perspective on what a deliberate grandparent is. Below are three tips on what intentional and purposeful grandparents look like today.
How healthy is your mind? Please receive a rating.
3 tips for intentional grandparents (both near and far)
1. Practice gratitude.
As the grandparent of three children under the age of five, another halfway through, I am in a paralyzed stage where I often stare at adorable faces. I love the kisses, hugs and stories that are read before bed. I am in awe of my son and his beautiful wife. But I often remain grateful from afar.
When I visit my son’s family, I wash my clothes and dishes and clean them all day long. I try to ease some chores so my very pregnant stepdaughter can lift her legs, but she doesn’t. She runs up the stairs, drops matching outfits for all three, and chases around to help her get dressed in front of the church. These are precious days and are just as precious as my children were when they were young. I was so grateful to be a part of their lives that I was thinking of renting a house across the street.
Yes, I am grateful for these moments, and I just say it to God.
2. Remember the intentional grandparents that went before you.
When I talk to women, I think of intentional, purposeful, respectful grandparents, but I am impressed with everything they do to teach, guide and enjoy their grandchildren.
When I returned to the woman I called my grandmother, she was always hugging me when I stepped into the wide country kitchen. Her smile lit up the room as she pressed my face against her blue and white cotton dress. She loved me with all her heart. How precious was her kind, kind spirit when my soul was troubled! She gave me the quiet, unobtrusive love I needed so much.
Each grandparent loves his grandchild very differently. They teach their grandchildren golf, carpenter, needlework, music, or what their grandparents have taught them. We want to give us the most precious things to those we love.
I have always loved the stories my grandparents told me. It is important to share the history of our family and all the colorful stories that come with it.
We share immigrant stories about how we came here last year, the last century, or even before that. But I also have even more valuable treasures to share with my grandchildren!
3. Give your grandson the most precious part of you: yes.
“But we have this treasure in a clay jar.
There is a unique opportunity for me as “Laura.” My own story of coming to my grandchildren to know Christ, giving him the way that God softened my stubborn heart and attracted me to myself with his loving arms. Don’t keep quiet about that story.
To practice being a deliberate grandparent, I need to tell my grandchildren that while I love this life, I long for the day when everything is right and I see all the face of God and all the glory of God. I need to tell them about eternity. I need to tell them how much God loves them and longs for an eternal relationship with them. We have a unique and God-given place to tell the truth to the ears of our precious grandchildren.
They can’t really know who I am or who they are without knowing the God of the universe.
And I can introduce it!
One afternoon I was fascetimizing with those sweet brown eyes and ceiling fans. I learned that my grandson had recently accepted Christ as His Savior. If you could jump over the phone! In simple terms, he explained to me his new faith.
It’s so sweet to know that my grandson chose the good part that won’t take from him. God draws my little man towards himself and I can see the miracles that are going on.
Renting that house across the street for a better view is beginning to seem like a great idea!
Words for you, intentional grandparents
To Gizzy, Popo, Poppi, Grandma, Grampus, Noise (I like that Grandma’s name), God has given you a lifelong experience, family history and gratitude.
Each grandparent is uniquely talented. When you try to become an intentional and purposeful grandparent, know that God has placed you in the exact place he intended so that you can point your little things to Christ.
“There is no greater joy than hearing my children walk through the truth” (3 John 4).
Copyright©2025 by FamilyLife. Unauthorized reproduction is prohibited.
Laura is a Family Life author and missionary and is known for her commitment to strengthening marriage and family through Christ-centered ministry in Latin America. She is Roger’s wife, mom of four notable adult children, two daughters, two daughters, two daughters, and three cheerful grandchildren living far away. Roger and Laura are blessed with several foster children. They live in Windsboro, South Carolina.
