Thanksgiving was one of our favorite holidays. I woke up to the smell of a turkey roasting in the oven, the sound of the Thanksgiving parade on the TV, and the anticipation of everyone gathered around the big table and my plate filled with my favorite dishes that only come once a year.
It was great growing up in a large family with several siblings. Core memories were established by the hustle and bustle of a holiday filled with laughter, play, lively conversation, and fun. There’s nothing like family, especially during the holiday season.
But as we all grow and our individual families expand, adding more family members and different backgrounds, communication styles, and personalities, it can sometimes create some tension and challenges in the Thanksgiving holiday environment.
Recognizing that holidays can be stressful, Family relationships are difficult, but we know that combining the two is even more difficult. But Psalm 133:1 He says to us, “How wonderful and joyful it is for God’s people to live together in unity.”God created families and knew that we would sometimes struggle to maintain unified relationships, so we need to ask God for guidance on how to live as a family.
One of the first things we can do to encourage family unity is to pray.
When praying for family unity during Thanksgiving, there are several areas of prayer to consider. We can pray for the following:
U – Understand
“Be thoroughly humble and kind. Be patient and bear with one another in love. ” – Ephesians 4:2
Pray that God would soften the hearts of families of all generations and create a rich environment that welcomes connection. You don’t just have to listen to understand, you have to listen to learn. Take the time to learn things you didn’t know about each other before. Listen to their stories and ask questions about their lives so you can really understand them.
Father, we ask that you create in us a pure heart, free from all that prevents us from accepting your correction and accepting others. You are kind, patient, and humble. We strive to embody the same qualities in our interactions with others. Grant us patience and wisdom in dealing with those who may be having difficulties. Help us to love each other and be a good example of my change. Thank you for your understanding. Amen.
N – Nurture
“Let’s encourage each other and build each other up. ” —1 Thessalonians 5:11
Nurturing means encouraging and uplifting each other. Try to think of others before yourself and be patient and kind. Pray that you can find common ground and see others through God’s eyes. Be quick to give honest praise and praise for things that go well. Extend grace when mistakes are made and look for positive strengths in each person.
Father God, encourage us so that we can be an inspiration to others. Fill us and allow us to naturally give to you what flows from our hearts. It heals unhealed wounds and softens hard and bitter places. Help us to lift each other up, both the young children in our families and the elders we study. We want to strengthen the faith of the next generation, and we want to be grateful for those who have walked the faith journey before us. Please help us to raise others. Amen.
I – Interaction
“Pleasant words are like honeycomb, sweet to the heart and soothing to the bones. ” – Proverbs 16:24
To foster unity, we need to recognize the power of our words. Our interactions are based on verbal and non-verbal communication. Our goal is to use our words and gestures to uplift each other, but to do that our words and gestures must be positive. Use your words to encourage, heal, and bring joy to those around you, even in the face of hardship.
Father God, please remind us that our words have power. When others challenge us, help us to step back and respond like Jesus did. May every word uplift you and bring you glory. Help us to allow our verbal and nonverbal communication to reflect our faith life. We want our words to be healing and to bring families together instead of tearing them apart. Don’t use words to promote yourself and put others down. Give me wisdom to solve any challenges that may arise. We give you these things because you have the ability. We want to make sure you are satisfied with our interactions. Amen.
T – Trust
All you say should be “yes” or “no.” Anything more comes from evil. Matthew 5:37
In some cases, a breakdown in trust can destroy relationships that last for generations. Jesus taught that getting the word out is essential to building trust, and anything more is from evil. Trust must be earned, and you can begin the process of earning it by being honest and transparent. Stay away from gossip and treat others as you would like to be treated. Don’t let past hurts destroy your family unity.
Father God, help us to trust You first. We know that you have placed everyone in their rightful place as part of our family, and we believe that you know best. Please help us lead by example and act in a trustworthy manner. Break down the walls that have been placed between relationships that have caused distance and pain in the past. Create a safe atmosphere free of judgment and gossip to establish and grow trust. We know you are capable. It can be difficult at times, so please share your wisdom in this area. Help us to be trusted and trusted. Amen.
Y – Follow God’s Way
“Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. ” —Ephesians 5:21
Following God’s way out of obedience is the key to creating an atmosphere that praises the Lord. In his letter to the Ephesians, Paul teaches that submitting to one another is the way to honor Christ. Submission means being humble and treating others with respect. This can be difficult in strained relationships, but it begins with one person deciding to bring unity to the family by walking in obedience to the Lord.
Father, sometimes it is difficult to submit to one another because of past hurts. So we give our hearts to you first because you are trustworthy. We also offer you our pride, our selfish ways, and our desires. Bring them all under the obedience of Christ. Help us to submit to the rest of our family as we submit to You. We know that Matthew 20:16 says, “The last shall be first, and the first shall be last.” We ask you to bring this back to our memory so that we may follow your ways and not ours. Help us to be selfless in our dealings with others by prompting us when we begin to become proud. This brings unity to our family and helps us remember all that we have to be grateful for. Please help us to follow your path. Because doing so will create peace and unity. Amen.
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Is this easy? Absolutely not. This requires one-on-one time with God, asking Him to heal where healing is needed, to forgive where forgiveness is needed, and to empower us to see through God’s eyes and the love that He loves for family unity.
As we gather as a family around a blessed Thanksgiving table, let us put aside our differences, pride, and unforgiveness and embrace love. “And above all, they are clothed with love, which unites everything in perfect harmony. ” —Colossians 3:14
Photo credit: ©Getty Images/Drazen Zigic
Dr. Cindy Collier, a retired educator and psychologist for 35 years, is now a mission president, speaker, women’s Bible teacher, and author. She has been featured in the Bible study tool “Crosswalk” and is the author of two educational books: “The Special Educator’s Toolkit” and “The Data Collection Toolkit.” She is a survivor of an abusive marriage dominated by addiction, pornography, and mental illness. Cindy uses her testimony and shares the testimonies of other women to glorify God on her website CindyCollier.org and social media sites.
