Years ago, when my husband and I were interviewing for membership in our church, the pastor looked me in the eye and said, “You are a young married couple who could easily be taken advantage of by being asked to help with many of the church’s services. If that happens, how do you make sure you don’t overburden yourself?” “I’m not a people-pleaser. If someone asks me to do something that I can’t do or that isn’t part of my God-given gifts, I’ll say no to that request. The pastor was a little taken aback, but satisfied with my answer. What if I was the person who said yes to everything asked in a church setting? Eventually, I would end up feeling burnt out and frankly resentful as a result of it all. Such a scenario will not bring glory to God.
Conversely, you may be someone who loves being involved in all aspects of church service. You literally thrive in that environment. But even though it seems helpful, does it prevent others from serving within their gifts?
To use an example from my own life, it would be different if I was saying “no” to helping someone just because I didn’t want to. There’s a difference between saying “I can’t” and simply saying “no” because you have other commitments, such as a young family or elderly parents, or because your work schedule doesn’t allow you to help in the time you need when you have all the time in the world to help.
Human interests are cunning. We may think we are making a prayerful and wise decision by saying no to requests or yes to everything. In fact, we try to please ourselves or please others to fit God’s interests in our lives without truly discerning what God wants us to do and where He wants us to serve.
Whose approval is most important in your life? The Apostle Paul asks the same question…”Am I now trying to gain the approval of men? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.” Galatians 1:10 He later answers… “We must obey God and not men.” Acts 5:29
A God-centered life requires us to prioritize God’s will over human expectations. Let’s consider how we can put God’s interest at the center of our lives.
Understand God’s Benefits
“O mortals, the Lord has taught you what is good. And what does He require of you? To act justly, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God.” Micah 6:8
Last week, I hosted a morning women’s Bible fellowship at my home. When I say I cleaned a place that hadn’t been cleaned in years, I actually did! I was looking all over the house with a microscope. We also cleaned the shower! I didn’t think anyone was going to look in my shower, let alone take a shower. But there it is. lol.
We do that, right? I think people come into the house with white gloves and magnifying glasses to inspect the cleanliness of the house. Still, I’m sure you’re no different than me. I never see or care about these things. I am very happy to be in a warm and cozy home with my loved ones. What matters to me is their heart, not what’s going on inside the house.
When we seek to do something for others, whether it is for our families, our children’s school, or our church, we are in the center of God’s will when our motives are consistent with God’s interests in acting justly, loving mercy, and walking humbly with God. But if in those actions you have the slightest doubt about how you appear to others or maybe your pride is running high, you know you need to confess it to the Lord, reevaluate your motives, and proceed accordingly.
The only person you need to be concerned with as you move forward with your assignment is Jesus. Whatever it is, an eternal perspective is important, not a momentary recognition.
But there is a difference between being self-sacrificing when the Lord commands you to act that way in a particular situation, and being a doormat for someone’s approval. Let me be clear.
When humility with an eternal perspective drives our actions, we can be sure that we are putting God’s interests above human interests.
Signs You May Be Focused on Men’s Interests
So Saul said to Samuel, “I have sinned. I have violated the commandment of the Lord and your instructions. I was afraid of the people, so I submitted to them. 1 Samuel 15:24.”
There are important people in my life who make people happy. As a result, many people get very frustrated with constantly breaking their boundaries, which ends up causing a lot of stress. But fear of what might happen or what the other person might do allows them to break down their boundaries. This creates a never-ending cycle of being taken advantage of and, frankly, a lot of anxiety. this is,
That’s the downside of focusing on human interests over what’s best for you, much less what’s best for you.
As seen in the example from the life of King Saul above, fear of humans can lead us to violate the Lord’s commands. There is a danger in always trying to please others. Fear of rejection can lead us to do things that are contrary to God’s commands. Our desire to be accepted can even lead to a compromise of Biblical values, such as a girl feeling pressured to have sex. Out of fear of losing her boyfriend, she gives up on the pregnancy. Her life as a believer is now completely turned upside down.
As you can see, the above example is different from “Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others more than yourself, each one looking to the interests of others rather than his own.” Philippians 2:3-4 This verse does not mean that we disrespect ourselves or disobey God for the benefit of others, but rather that we check our own hearts to see if we are bulldozing them against others out of our own selfish ambition or vain conceit.
What are the signs that you may be focused on a man’s interests? A constant need for approval, fear of telling the truth, compromising values to fit in, or measuring success by the world’s standards.
Benefits of prioritizing God’s interests
“But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.” Matthew 6:33
Interestingly enough, as a self-proclaimed follower of rules, I don’t like to please people. If there are rules somewhere, I will follow them. This could be due to being Miss Goody Two Shoes since childhood, but again, it’s just about rules, not about pleasing others.
What was even more shocking was that he was bullied relentlessly during his junior high school days. I was very tall and thin and had buck teeth. You would think this scenario would have been the perfect storm to create something that would please people. But that didn’t happen. I hid it from my parents until I was much older, but what happened to me in middle school wasn’t because I was afraid of what my parents would say, it was because those girls embarrassed me, and it’s my parents’ fault that I couldn’t be a people pleaser. why? Because they always lifted me up with affirmation and encouragement. They instilled in me the kind of person I would become and my worth.
When we seek Him first and foremost, He will pour into us. He reminds us that we were chosen before the world began. God is our Heavenly Father who sent His Son Jesus to die for our sins. We are God’s beloved people. When we know our standing before God, we don’t need to seek the approval of others. Because we are heirs of the kingdom of God, in Christ Jesus. As a child of God, we have no fear. He is our provider and protector.
How can we shift our focus to God? Pray daily, seek God’s guidance, study the Bible regularly, surround yourself with godly influences, practice obedience even in small decisions, and develop a godly fear of God toward humanity.
As a result, we reap the benefits of prioritizing God’s interests, including peace of mind, self-confidence, spiritual growth, and maturity. We will no longer be concerned with human interests, but our hearts will be set on God’s interests.
Dear Heavenly Father, let the mind of Christ rule my mind in all things. Are you more concerned with God’s interests or human interests?
What steps will you take to adjust your thinking to one that puts God’s best interests first?
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Karen Dell Tattoo is a blogger, author, women’s ministry leader, pastor’s wife, mother, and grandmother who is passionate about God’s Word. Her blog, “Growing Together in Grace and Knowledge,” and her books, “Choosing to Trust God: Breaking the Habit of Worry,” “A 30-Day Devotional,” and “Choosing to Trust God Companion Journal,” reveal her heart offering biblical insights to inspire women to grow in, through, and overcome hardship. Karen and her husband live in Rhode Island and enjoy walking in the woods, petting owls, and spending time with their grandchildren.
