Community is not an option. The Bible makes that clear. From the earliest days of the church, believers were meant to live in communion. We are meant to pray together, encourage each other, confess our sins, bear each other’s burdens, and worship side by side. Community is God’s design. But that wasn’t what we focused on.
Biblical community has a higher purpose. Biblical communities are meant to strengthen us in God, not make us dependent on the people in them. Because people come and go, but God remains the same.
God’s Design for Living Together
The New Testament is full of commands to “one another” that represent true biblical community. We are asked to:
● Pray for one another (Ephesians 6:18)
● Encourage and build each other up (1 Thessalonians 5:11)
● Exhort and admonish one another (Hebrews 3:13; Romans 15:14)
● Love one another (John 13:34)
● Bear one another’s burdens (Galatians 6:2)
● Serve and forgive one another (Galatians 5:13; Ephesians 4:32)
● Confess your sins to one another (James 5:16)
● We meet regularly for worship and encouragement (Hebrews 10:24–25).
These are Biblical commands, not suggestions. Community is designed to strengthen us, sharpen us, and help us pursue Christ together. And for many of us, community feels like a lifeline. But the tension here is:
Community is a gift. That’s not our source.
When the community is taken away
This conviction does not come only from theology. It came from my life experience of learning to rely on God when loved ones leave for any reason or community becomes unavailable.
When I was in my 20s, one of my closest friends and strongest support system passed away from cancer at just 28 years old. She was vibrant and full of faith. She walked with me through one of the most difficult times of my life. Her illness was early. Her absence was permanent. And that loss shook me at a young age in ways that words cannot express.
When I was in my 30s, my best friend, who I had shared my life with, traveled with my family, and had deep conversations with, suddenly ended our relationship without any explanation. There are no warnings. There is no closure. Just be silent. To this day, I don’t understand why she ended our friendship. There was no explanation or final conversation. I had unanswered questions that I had to confide in God as I grieved the loss and learned to rely on Him more deeply.
When I was in my 40s, a close friend from college who had been with me through motherhood left her husband, and after years of struggling with her mental health, she slowly fell into a self-destructive lifestyle. As I watched her unravel, a slow, complicated sadness developed. The person still exists, but the friendship you once knew no longer exists. That told me I couldn’t carry her or fix her. Only Christ could do that.
When I entered my fifties, the Christian college community that we had poured our lives into for so many years ended when the small college where we worked closed. This is not just about losing a job. It was the loss of a unique and deeply loved community. But in the end, God brought me closer to Him and helped me focus more on Him and my identity, which is found only in Him.
And now, at this time of year, my dear friend and mentor of over 25 years is in hospice. The woman who taught me how to walk faithfully with God is now teaching me how to prepare to stand before God. As her earthly power wanes, her spiritual power becomes even more pronounced, a quiet reminder that God is faithful even to the end of life.
There were also long seasons when no formal Christian community existed. No small groups. There are no tight circles. Like-minded believers do not consistently come together. Only God and His Word. This leads to a solemn but necessary question.
What would happen to your relationship with God if the community you depended on was gone? Do you think you have strong faith in yourself? Will you find yourself walking with God?
Sometimes God allows us to be gently removed from our community, not because He doesn’t value it, but because He wants us to learn that the foundation of our faith can only be strong if it is in God alone.
The dangers of misplaced dependence
The danger is not in loving the community deeply, but in becoming ultimately dependent on it. If our hearts are primarily fixed on people, when those people leave, fail, or pass away, our spiritual footing begins to slip. But if that community strengthens us in God, our faith will be strong even if it fades away.
Psalm 62:5-6 says: “Yes, my soul, find rest in God; my hope comes from God; yea, God is my rock and my salvation; God is my stronghold; I will not be shaken.”
The community was never meant to be your fortress. Only God is like that.
Jonathan and David: Strengthened by God
In the friendship between Jonathan and David, we see the true purpose of the community. While David was hiding from Saul, the Bible says: “Jonathan arose and went to David at Horesh and strengthened his hands in God.” (1 Samuel 23:16)
Jonathan did not make David more dependent on him. He strengthened his trust in God. He reminded David of God’s promises and faithfulness and then left. Jonathan understood that if David’s strength relied solely on their friendship, it would not last. It had to be rooted in the Lord. This is what the Bible community does. It prepares us to stand even when our friends are no longer next to us.
God remains even when man cannot
Psalm 73:26 is more than just a poem to me; it has become a lifeline. “Though my flesh and heart fail, God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.”
People make mistakes, but not necessarily on purpose. Sometimes it’s just because they’re human. Life ends. But God does not fail. And truly, a healthy community reinforces that truth.
This is not a call to abandon community. We are required to pursue it correctly. Hebrews 10:24-25 reminds us not to neglect gathering together, but to encourage one another toward love and good works. We are commanded to come together, encourage one another, and walk together. However, Galatians 6:2 makes our role clear: “Carry one another’s burdens, thus fulfilling the law of Christ.” We help carry the burden, but Christ remains the one who truly carries us.
And Hebrews 13:8 establishes in us the truth that “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever.” Communities change. Friendships change. Seasons change. But Christ remains the same.
stay at the source of truth
Jesus reminded us in John 15:5: “I am the vine, and you are the branches…Apart from Me you can do nothing.” We do not derive our life from others. We draw life from Christ. Community is one of the ways God provides for us, but God is the only source. So there’s a question we have to ask.
If the community you love most today suddenly disappeared, would your faith crumble or would you cling even more tightly to God? Your answer will reveal whether the community has strengthened your dependence on Christ or whether it has replaced Christ and become just a “group of friends.”
People come and go. Seasons change. And even the best communities will change or decline at some point. But God is not like that. And when the community has finished its sacred work, we are left standing not on relationships, but on a rock that never moves.
let’s pray
Father, we thank you for the gift of community and people who pray with us, walk with us, and strengthen us. Please forgive us for relying more on people than on you. Please tell me how to maintain a loose community with gratitude instead of dependence. Strengthen our hearts so that our faith will not waver even when relationships change, facilities close, and loved ones are taken home. May our lives and friendships always point to you, the unchanging rock who is our alter ego forever. In the name of Jesus, amen.
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Gina Smith is a wife of 37 years, mother of two, and grandmother of three. She is a writer and author, and wrote her first published book during the empty nest years. She has a passion for working with young people, encouraging them, strengthening them in God, and learning from them. Gina can be found on her website www.ginalsmith.com and her book Everyday Prayers for Joy can be found wherever books are sold.
