Throughout my childhood and early adulthood, I relied on my father on my rocks. He was a pastor who consistently studied the Bible, introduced me to Jesus, promoted my desire to serve the Lord, and gave me love for the Bible. I loved him and cared for him.
However, in my 30s, my relationship with my father shifted. A drug intended to help him become addicted after suffering from decades of chronic illness. My dad’s substance abuse changed him – and it changed something inside me too. It also brought the question to the surface of my heart: Is God a good father for me?
It was hard to admit, but it seemed like my father reversed the course and failed, so I thought maybe God could do the same thing. I predicted the feelings I had for my heavenly Father towards my earthly father. So I struggled to trust the Lord as a good father.
I went to God in prayer, knowing I needed to readjust my heart to the truth. I openly and honestly expressed my struggle against trusting him as my good father and felt that he was inviting me on a journey to get to know him more deeply.
As I walked the path to rediscovering God as my beloved Father, one of the ways in which my heart was renewed was to see God’s fatherhood throughout the life of a biblical saint. In particular, two lives have had a huge impact on me.
God was Joseph’s faithful Father
I cried out the Old Testament account of Joseph’s life in connection with the heartbreak he suffered (see Gen. 37; 39-45). Joseph’s flesh and blood brother turned his back on him and sold him to slavery. When he became the leader of Pottifer’s house, when his life seemed to be climbing upwards, he was falsely accused and sent to prison.
I think Joseph questioned God’s hand when he endured the long day and night sitting in prison. I asked the same question when my father’s addiction year took away hopes, dreams and expectations. Lord, where are you? I often wondered.
The words of Genesis 39:2 shine a bright (and holy) light into the darkness of Joseph’s story. “The Lord was with Joseph,” in betrayal, false accusations, loneliness, the Lord was still with him. Then, with Joseph, the Lord was released from prison, became ruler in Egypt, and reunited with his family.
It helped him to see the faithfulness of the Lord through Joseph’s horrifying circumstances, and that he had never been abandoned by his heavenly Father, even though he had been abandoned by all others. This example of God showing himself as Joseph’s faithful father embraced my heart to trust my heart in me and as a constant father.
God was the loving father of a bleeding woman
As I continued to study God’s character in the Bible, the familiar stories of a bleeding woman were once again completely new. I thought I might share some of the pain, isolation and losses I had experienced during my father’s struggle with addiction.
After living with an incurable illness for 12 years, she stepped into faith and gathered the courage to ignore the rules of dirt by reaching for Jesus’ robe. Soon she was rewarded with healing (see Luke 8:43-48).
Jesus met her gaze and spoke beautiful words: “Daughter, your faith has made you feel better, and it will be peace” (Luke 8:48 ESV).
Jesus, the Son of God, will fit the Father to God, and the Holy Spirit is one of the Trinity. And when we see the actions of Jesus, we also see the actions of the Father (John 14:9-10). When Christ gave this woman healing – both physically and spiritually, she was accepted by God the Father and called his “daughter.” This condition of affection is provided to all who reach out to faith and embrace the spiritual healing that Jesus offers through salvation.
As I read her story again, I heard Jesus whisper the same sweet words to me: “Daughter.” I am the child of the King of Heaven and my father is perfect for me. He’s the same for you.
Trusting God is a good father
When our hearts are broken and swim in betrayal, it is difficult to pass a broken heart and move into the knowledge of the true, pure and lovely thing (Philippians 4:8). I wish I could say that my struggle to trust God when my good father disappeared soon disappeared, but that would be a lie. What I did and what you can do is focus on the truth. Our “Heavenly Father is perfect” (Matt. 5:48). He remains unchanged, and it is impossible for him to lie (Heb 6:17-18).
A good father who fulfilled his promise to Joseph and welcomed the bleeding woman who chased his daughter into his family, is the same father who continues to be faithful, merciless and kind to his children today. We can rely on, take comfort, run to the arms of one True Father who will leave, betray, or not abandon us (Matt 28:20; Heb 13:5b).
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Rosann Coulon is the author of My Father: A 40 Days Book to God Finding Refuge in God’s Heart. She contributed articles to the Gospel Union, Daily League Race Inc., Core Christianity and other publications. She is the founder who leaves the well ministry whose mission is to share a heart-breaking heart and biblical hope by providing Christ-centered resources. Visit Rosann at www.levingawell.com to receive free, inspirational content. You can also connect with her at Instagram.com/rosann_coulon.