Sometimes the most beloved holidays can also bring the most stress. Between dozens of family gatherings, work parties, and festive traditions, a season meant to mean peace and joy can quickly bring anxiety, overwhelm, and despair. We find ourselves waiting for the season to end rather than savoring those precious moments.
If you’re like me, it’s natural to feel anxious at times like Christmas. You don’t ask it to appear, you just let it. Unfortunately, anxiety steals many things, including our very existence. Here are three tips I’m using to overcome (or lessen) holiday anxiety this season, one step at a time.
1. Focus on the present
Luke 10 records a familiar and well-known exchange between Mary, Martha, and Jesus. Mary decides to sit at Jesus’ feet and listen intently when he arrives, but Martha is busy cleaning up, cooking, and preparing for Jesus’ arrival. Mary chooses to focus on the present, but Martha has many other things on her mind.
“While Jesus and his followers were traveling, Jesus went to a town where a woman named Martha let him stay in her house. She had a sister named Mary. Mary sat at Jesus’ feet and listened to him teach. But my sister Martha was busy doing all the work that needed to be done. Martha came into the house and said, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has given me all the work?” Tell her to help me! ”But the Lord answered her: “Martha, Martha, you are worried and distraught about too many things. Only one thing matters: Mary made the right choice, and that will never be taken away from her” (Luke 10:38-42, ERV).
If you want to reduce anxiety during the hectic season, you have to start by focusing on your present. Instead of looking ahead or behind you, try focusing on the most important tasks in the present moment. As Jesus said to Martha, many things try to get our attention, but only one thing matters.
Focusing on the present:
-Be aware of the moment: Pay attention to sights, sounds, and smells. When you’re out and about, put your phone away and look around.
-Take time to breathe and re-center: This is especially important when you’re feeling overwhelmed. Breathe for a few minutes, relax your jaw, and shake your shoulders.
– Meditate on God’s Word: Choose one or two simple scripture passages this season that are easy to memorize. When anxiety grows in your heart, remember these verses and pray to God.
2. Focus on yourself
When we learn to focus on the present, we must also learn to focus on our own being. As Christians, the way we live our lives directly impacts those around us. People are always watching and observing how we react when life doesn’t go as planned. Holidays are one of the biggest times when things don’t go as planned. But what matters is how we react – our presence.
Being present is important, but it’s equally important to bring your presence to any given moment. Focusing on who you are means identifying what you can and cannot change. When it comes to reducing anxiety during the holidays, this is beneficial as it helps you deal with problems logically and realistically.
As someone who suffers from generalized anxiety disorder, I can tell you for a fact that many of the things I worry about may never happen. But it takes the rational part of your brain to notice when you’re anxious. And let’s be honest, sometimes we just can’t explain our anxiety no matter how hard we try. Learning to focus on what you bring to a situation and what you can and can’t change will help reduce anxiety because you have to talk about everything about yourself.
Psalm 51:16-17 shows us giving our all to Jesus in this way. “You do not want a sacrifice, or I will offer one. You do not want a burnt offering. The sacrifice you want is a broken spirit. God, you will not reject a broken and contrite heart” (NLT). If we want to be present, we must learn how to tell God how we really are.
When you focus on your own being:
-Talk to God about what you can and cannot control: Try making a list of the things that make you anxious. Next, divide your list into things you can control and things you can’t. Ask God to help you let go of what is beyond your control and for grace in dealing with what is within your control.
-If you are attending a social gathering and are feeling anxious, use the 5-4-3-2-1 technique to ground yourself. Ground yourself, take a few deep breaths, and realize: 5 things you can see, 4 things you can touch, 3 things you can hear, 2 things you can smell, and 1 thing you can taste.
3. Focus on the present
All that we have learned this season to be present by being honest and authentic will be wasted if we remember to focus on the present itself. Unlike the other gifts we receive during this season, life’s greatest gift was given to us as a baby born in a manger. Jesus did not come in a perfectly wrapped box with a ribbon on the top, but He came exactly as God saw fit.
When anxiety is swirling around in your mind, it becomes difficult to concentrate on other things. Especially for those of us with clinical disorders such as OCD, GAD, or PTSD, focusing on the present, on Jesus Christ, can seem almost impossible. But here’s the good news. Jesus doesn’t expect us to be perfect. He tells us to come as we are and that is enough.
With my worries piling up and my grief weighing on me, I approached this lowly stable with open arms and bent knees. Like the wise man in Matthew 2:11, I surrender as I worship the King. Not because my anxiety will immediately go away, but because I know that this baby was born for people like me: people who are hurting, sinful, messy, complicated, depressed, and yes, even anxious. Realizing that allows me to focus on who the gifted God is, who died for me, no matter where I am.
Focusing on the present:
-Accepting who God says we are despite our insecurities. Remember, there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus (Romans 8:1), and Christ is not ashamed of our struggles.
-Ask God to help you turn to Him during this overwhelming season. Write a prayer asking for help to focus on what matters most.
No matter what anxiety you’re feeling this holiday season, I hope these three tips help you live a little more in the moment. As we learn to focus on our present and the presence we bring, God’s presence, the greatest present, will become clearer. May God bless you now and forever as you enjoy who He is in this season and throughout the year.
agape, amber
Photo credit: ©Unsplash/Ben White
Amber Ginter is a teacher-turned-author who loves Jesus, her husband Ben, and granola. Growing up, Amber looked for resources on faith and mental health, but couldn’t find anything. Now, she gives hope to young Christians struggling with mental illness that goes beyond just reading the Bible and praying more. Because even though we love Jesus, we can still be plagued by anxiety. You can download her top faith and mental health resources for free to help you navigate books, podcasts, videos, and influencers from a faith perspective. Visit her website at amberginter.com.
